


Look at the Stars

by Tama_Turtle



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Academy Era, Actual plot, Aviophobia, Character Development, Depression, Eventual Romance, Eventual Sex, Explicit Language, F/M, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Interplanetary Travel, Language, M/M, Minor Character Death, Multi, Plot Devices, Star Trek: AOS, Starfleet, Starfleet Academy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-20
Updated: 2016-07-20
Packaged: 2018-07-23 19:29:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,466
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7476909
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tama_Turtle/pseuds/Tama_Turtle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sarah Foley is a troubled young woman, who experienced a traumatic event. Only a few months after this life-changing event, she enlists in Starfleet Academy, where she meets Doctor Leonard McCoy, who she discovers is running from the past as well. Will his own toxicity bleed into her already harsh perception of the world? Or will he be the pessimist that helps her find the silver lining? However, he's not the only influential person Sarah's met at the Academy. Cadets James T. Kirk and Nyota Uhura help transform her life, but is it for the better?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Look at the Stars

**Author's Note:**

> This was inspired by Jessica_Bones_Winchester, whose writing was just so beautiful, it made me feel so emotionally connected to the story. I hope I can create that same connection in my readers. :')  
> Please leave any feedback in the comments below, it's always appreciated. :)
> 
> Side note, any alterations in "..." is intentional, and if words are spelt differently, it's because that's how we're taught to spell those words in Australia.

2233

“Shh, it’s okay, mama’s here,” The plump, ginger-haired woman whispered as she attempted to calm the wailing, blue-eyed baby in her arms, her lanky husband rubbing her back in soothing circles. “Isn’t she just beautiful?”

“Absolutely,” He smiled. “what was her name again?”

“Sarah,” The newborn girl’s crying began to quieten upon hearing her name, one so fitting, so right. “Sarah Foley.”

“When did you want to sign her adoption forms?” The woman contemplated this carefully before answering her husband.

“We’ll let her grow up a little bit more, no one has to know just yet.”

***  
2255

The muscled, young, brunette woman of twenty-two sat peacefully on the shuttle, reading about various muscles in the human back, dutifully ignoring her surroundings, specifically the older man beside her, panicking about being in space when he’s looking at a career with Starfleet, of which, operates in space - some people were just weird. 

“Excuse me, yeah, you with the PADD pretending to ignore the world.” Sarah looked up into the bright blue eyes of a blond man with an arrogant smirk on his face, leaning over the now slightly less panicking man beside her. “I’m sure I can provide you with something more interesting than whatever it is you’re reading there.”

“I’m sure you can’t.” Sarah responded sharply, reading her passage once more. The man addressing her seemed shocked - since when do women dismiss him so...rudely?

‘When the facet joints or certain other structures in the spine become injured or inflamed, the large back muscles can spasm and cause low back pain and marked limitation in motion. An episode of lower back pain that lasts for more than two weeks -’

“So then, uh, what are ya reading then?” The man tried once again to engage in conversation with her.

“A passage detailing back muscle injuries.” Sarah answered rather abruptly, continuing to read. 

‘An episode of lower back pain that lasts for more than two weeks can lead to muscle weakness -’

“Fascinating, I’m James Kirk, but you can call me ‘Jim’, it’s a pleasure to-”

“I’ve read that passage, although if you’re actually interested in physiotherapy of any sort, it’s shit.” The panicked and disheveled man interrupted Jim Kirk thoughtlessly, and Sarah noticed a Southern accent weaving through his words as she listened, making eye contact with his green orbs.

“And what would you recommend?” He was shocked to even elicit a response, let alone one that expected an answer, but he didn’t hesitate to indulge her. If a girl like her was actually interested in what he had to say, he wasn’t going to complain, and he was more than content to ignore Kirk sitting beside him looking slightly annoyed about his easy dismissal.

“Holst and Peterson, ‘Physiological adaptations of the muscular system of humans and non-humans alike’, probably one of the best, I think I have it here somewhere actually…” He trailed off, searching through many pockets within different clothing items, before finally giving up. “Never mind, I’ll find it for ya sometime during the week.”

“I look forward to it then.” She nodded at him, and allowed her mouth to curl upwards only slightly. “Thank you.”

“Ah, don’t mention it.” They both allowed the non-conversation to end, but Kirk didn’t seem to think it should be.

“So what’s your name?”

“Sarah Foley.”

“Well, as I said before, my name is Jim Kirk, and this old man here is Bones McCoy.” Sarah raised an eyebrow in question - ‘Bones’? She clearly wasn’t the only one confused, as Bones gave him an identical questioning look. “Well, you know, ya said all that’s left of ya are bones so. Bones.”

“Creative. It’s Leonard McCoy, ‘n’ I’m not that old.” 

“Pleasure to meet you, Bones.”

And thus ended her brief encounter with Leonard “Bones” McCoy and James “Jim” Kirk, as McCoy helped divert Kirk’s attention away from her, as he sensed she wasn’t feeling particularly chatty. 

It was true, since the accident, she has not felt the need to talk, and she had nowhere else to go but anywhere from here. How much further could you get than the other side of the galaxy?

***  
Upon arrival at San Francisco, the Starfleet Academy base of operations, there was an uproar in cadets. Uniforms were assigned - three, as well as a pair of boots, all more than likely replicated - dorms were assigned, and various shuttles were landing, providing many more students for the academy. Sarah was allocated her dorm room and given her access pass, as well as had her photo taken for recognition, various ID tests including thumbprints and voice commands, confirmation of classes, various PADD chips to be used in classes, and a chip to install a map of the academy and the surrounding area. 

Many different beings roamed the halls, some people dressed in black, presumably instructors of some sort, most dressed casually, laughing with friends. The break was almost over and classes were due to start in three days, so cadets were coming back in hoards to settle back in after their summer break.

Her dorm room was already occupied by a teenaged girl named Charla Henderson, barely out of high school, who thought that “space was really cool and stuff”, and had numerous clothes filling her wardrobe and dresser, nearly exploding with the sheer amount, lots of makeup thrown across a vanity that she seemed to have brought with her somehow, and already had physical photos of her and her friends scattered on a wall above the purple bed she’d occupied and made by the window. 

In Sarah’s opinion, she seemed to care more about how pretty she’ll look with a starry backdrop than actually exploring the far galaxies or making any genuine contribution to society in general, so she didn’t engage in socialisation, and Charla didn’t seem to judge Sarah worthy of her attention as it was.

Sarah fixed her dull, white sheeted bed with a small, stuffed, white bear. It was given to her by her birth mother before her adoptive mother found her, so she wasn’t entirely sure why she kept it, but something about it made her feel a little more whole than when she was without it. She didn’t care about being called childish for owning a teddy bear, it was hers, she wanted it, she loved it, not that she understood why.

On her bedside table stood one lamp, and two picture frames. The first was of her parents, the second was of her in her cot, before she was adopted, the little bear sat beside her. It was torn along the left; it was only a half photo. She never knew what was on the other side.

Her bed was posted closest to the kitchenette, which suited her fine, but furthest from the door, which meant it was slightly harder to leave. The brunette filled her wardrobe with the few clothes she actually brought with her, and used the rest of the space to store her shoes, the backpack she brought with her, and the three books she had left, ‘Primitive Weaponry of Ancient Earth’ which explored the various martial weapons until gunpowder was introduced, and “Martial Arts and Hand-to-Hand’, a book varying combats from Earth, popular and lesser known ones, as well as some observations of other planets such as Vulcan.

The third was a novel, ‘Look at the Stars’, and her favourite by far. A man meets his soulmates, one man, one woman, and they fall in love. Typical, yes? No. It explores their difficulties in their personal lives and how that interacts with their intertwined relationship, until one dies, leaving the other two lost and confused. In the end, they realise their loved one is never gone, never forgotten, and always guiding them. 

Sarah didn’t think she’d ever need a book to remind her of that. 

***  
Classes kicked off full force, and Sarah could not believe the amount of times she returned to bed with bruises all over her, it was just horrible, though, to her welcomed delight, sleep still came easily - perhaps she had a concussion? Perhaps she should see a doctor about that then… 

Regardless, she was actually enjoying the classes. Advanced Combat I was certainly trying, but it pushed her to become better. The only difficulty was that there were many others who were at her level, or higher. Her other classes were less physically demanding though, warmly seeping into her conscious memory.

Friday finally arrived, and her Spatial Physiotherapy class was over. It wasn’t a necessary course for her, as she wasn’t overly fascinated with medical studies of any sort, but for some reason, her instincts told her it was the right choice, that she’d need it at some point, and her instincts never led her astray. It was an enjoyable class, however, despite her initial lack of interest.

Upon leaving the theater, she heard a familiar voice calling her name. Turning, she met eyes with a now clean shaven McCoy’s...hazel...eyes...were they hazel before?

“Bones, what a shock to see you here.” She gave a small, polite yet sardonic smile, as they slowly walked together, their destination unknown to them both.

“Well, hello to you, too.” He grimaced. “Anyway, I couldn’t find the data chip for the book I toldja ‘bout but I managed to find a hard copy of it in a bookstore nearby. Here, keep it.”

He spoke quickly, handing it to her, without a grimace, and lazy eyes.

“You didn’t have to do that.” She spoke softly, accepting it graciously and flipping through the pages.

“You’re welcome.”

“Thank you…” She ignored the pink hue rising on her cheeks, letting her soft curls cover her face as she gazed over the book. It must’ve been expensive, books were not cheap these days, particularly academic ones, even if they are small. This was an in-depth report, large for a thesis, small for a book, but there were some demonstrative illustrations that took up whole pages, as well as complicated graphs and charts reporting research findings. 

“You’re not in any other medical classes.” McCoy stated, trying to initiate a conversation, as they waded through the sea of cadets together.

“No, physio is my only one. How do you know?” She looked at him, her face simply inquisitive, but otherwise, void of emotion and more importantly, blushing cheeks.

“‘Cause I do most of the main medical classes. Physio is just a small class I’m doin’ to change it up a little so I don’t get too bored. Spacial medicine isn’t much different from Earthen medicine, except I hafta learn the anatomy of dozens more non-Terran species.” He explained, leading them down a small hallway that got much less traffic than the last one, or perhaps everyone else was walking at an average pace - the two seemed to be walking very slowly.

“You’re a doctor.” Her voice echoed alongside their footsteps.

“Yeah, pretty much.” 

“And you’re studying medicine again, why?” They walked down a set of stairs, ignoring the elevator - there were always too many people using them. 

“Nowhere else to go on Earth.” ‘Because my ex-wife took the whole damn planet…’

“I get you, me too.” He grunted in response, and silence fell between them as they ended up in the courtyard garden, sitting contently on the unoccupied stone seat by the pond. Sarah had never noticed it empty, but she supposed it was late, and people were probably at the bar to celebrate the end of their first week.

Minutes passed before McCoy opened his mouth again.

“So, what classes are ya doin’, if not anythin’ else medical?” He looked at her, his face blank but his eyes curious.

“My course is mainly combat oriented, aside from physio, I’m doing Advanced Combat I, Battle Tactics, Basic Weapon Engineering, and a short course on non-Terran musical culture, although honestly, it’s rather boring, we don’t do a whole lot and there’s not much music involved either.” She heard his hollow chuckle, but focused instead, on the still pond water.

“A combat specialist, never woulda guessed. Tryin’ to be a captain then?” It was her turn to chuckle hollowly, with a gentle roll of her eyes, she stared back at him, and in that moment, she swore, he swore, that they were completely frozen in one another’s gaze, though neither would ever admit.

“No, I don’t care for that kind of responsibility,” she whispered almost inaudibly, but McCoy caught every word “I’d rather not have everyone’s lives at stake because of me and my actions.”

He nodded in agreeance.

“Though I’m also certain,” she continued, “that I’m almost always right.”

“Almost.” He chuckled once again.

“Therein lies the problem.” It was starting to chill, the sun hiding behind the horizon, though neither really cared, it was still rather brisk. “I take it you’re aiming for Chief Medical Officer?”

“I don’t give a shit if I’m the Chief or the Captain’s Yeoman, all I’m damn well hoping for is to pass and go to space.”

“Bones, you’re afraid of dying in something that flies.”

“So ya did hear me, huh.”

“I did, and tried to ignore you but I found it so ironically funny, I couldn’t.”

“Nice to know I made an impression.”

“Naturally.”

More small talk ensued, mostly one-sided with McCoy doing the talking but he didn’t seem to mind, and Sarah didn’t seem to mind listening either. He talked about what it was like back home in Georgia, the people there, the fresh air, minus the tobacco in the air every now and then, one of the more peaceful places in North America. 

One thing he didn’t talk about was family, and that didn’t go unnoticed by Sarah, but it wasn’t her business. Family could be a very touchy subject, especially when the man in question was nearly thirty years old, preparing to go into space when he had aviophobia (albeit, quite mild but overly stress-inducing nonetheless) and seemed to love his hometown a great deal.

Eventually, McCoy escorted Sarah to her dorm room, but before she disappeared behind the door, she grabbed his arm securely, and he responded with a questioning look. She didn’t seem to like physical contact much, nearly going out of her way to avoid touching people, and this behaviour was...inconsistent. 

“I’m not really good at asking for help, but I have to admit, I’m not all that good at medicine…”

“Go on.” He prompted, though he was sure he knew where this was going.

“Would you be willing to help me out with physio? I like the class and all but I find it a little...trying…” He snorted, receiving a menacing glare that he brushed off with ease.

“Don’t look at me like that, it’s just that when a fox asks an owl how to hunt, you don’t really know how else to react.”

“Excuse me?” She tilted her head sideways at the odd metaphor. “I don’t really have much medical expertise, so I don’t see how that’s relative.”

“Darlin’, ya have the ability, ‘cause clearly, you’ve been readin’ ‘bout it, ‘n’ I hope ya will some more, otherwise I just wasted my money, so ya have some basic understandin’ of the concepts, I don’t see why you’d need my help.” He leaned against the wall, an incredulous smirk on his face.

“Well, Bones, maybe I want to do excellently as opposed to simply adequate.” She challenged him with her dangerously blue eyes.

“Then who am I to deny a pretty lady?” She rolled her eyes, and refused the smile forcing its way to the surface, instead allowing a small smirk to quirk up the corners of her lips. “Do ya have any classes early Monday mornin’?”

“No, my first class is at noon.”

“Good, me too. How does Sunday nights at eighteen hundred hours sound? I’ll pick ya up here, we can go ‘n’ get some work done, grab a bite to eat, then work some more, ‘n’ that leaves our Saturday nights open for whatever.”

“You know the library is going to be packed with students cramming for their Monday morning pop quizzes, right?”

“Who said we’ll be goin’ to the library?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked the first chapter! Please leave any critiques/feedback in the comments, I'd love to hear your opinions! This'll be the shortest chapter of the lot, more an introductory type chapter.  
> Bones will be playing the part of Southern Gentleman, because I literally love Gentleman!Bones. :)


	2. Irish Coffee

Sunday didn’t come fast enough, in McCoy’s opinion, and yet, it came too fast. He felt anxiety building from the pit of his stomach to his clavicle, though more often than not, he squashed it down and tried to focus on what he needed to for his own classes within his desired field. It didn’t help that Kirk had brought a girl with him on Friday night, who then decided to stay for the weekend, essentially forcing him out of his own dorm - unless, of course, he wanted to be plagued by crude images of his only friend getting more work done on a girl than on his studying.

So, McCoy all but slept in the library that weekend, and practically stayed up all night on Friday in the library to avoid waking up to Kirk orgasming. Thankfully, the library was kept open all hours of the day, but it was unmanned from midnight until seven hundred hours. 

At eighteen hundred hours exactly, he rapped on the door belonging to the one, Sarah Foley, though he was not greeted by her sharp, blue eyes, but instead, a young girl’s bubbly brown ones.

“Can I help you?” She asked flirtatiously, her hand coming up to to twirl her pink hair. 

“Uh, does Sarah live here?” He asked nervously, not because of her though (her cheap flirting was weird and he was pretty sure she was too young to even be at the Academy), but he had the nagging feeling he knocked on some unsuspecting girl’s door who looked a little bored.

“Yeah, she is. Come in,” The girl sighed, allowing McCoy to pass through and pointed to the bed closest to the kitchenette. “That’s her side, she’s just in the bathroom, she won’t be long.”

The tall man stepped over some discarded clothes that he assumed were probably the belongings of the girl who invited him inside, to a plain bed, with a small, white teddy bear leaning against the pillows.

‘Cute.’ He smiled, then allowed his eyes to follow around, ignoring the pink-haired girl watching him curiously. There was a bedside table on one side, with a lamp, and a book, the same one he’d gifted her with just a few days before. 

“So, why are you here?” The girl asked, almost accusatory.

“Sarah ‘n’ I are studyin’ together.” His sharp eyes looked up at her, and she nodded, seeming to accept that.

“I didn’t realise she had any friends here,” He stiffened. Were they really friends?

“Acquaintances.” 

“You from the south?” She sat down on her purple-sheeted bed, leaning back on her hands, pushing her chest. Her eyes dilated and her tongue flicked out to lick her full, deep red lips. He nodded, and turned, continuing to analyse the rest of Sarah’s visible belongings. There were two picture frames sitting behind the book. He liked that, not many people still had picture frames.

“I’m Charla, by the way,” The sultry voice rang out, but he paid no mind to it. He looked only at the photo frames, the left was of an older couple, a plump, red-haired woman and a brown-haired man, smiling happily at the camera. The right frame contained the torn half photo of a baby in a cot, the very same bear - nearly torn out of the photo - lying beside her, as she smiled toothlessly at something on her right.

“Bones, sorry, I lost track of time,” His head whipped around to see Sarah with slightly damp hair and a blue towel in her arms.

“Don’t worry ‘bout it. Ready to go?” Sarah nodded once, putting her towel on a small clothes horse over a heater and grabbing a few things. As they began to depart, McCoy turned to Charla, and nodded acknowledgingly, “Nice to meet ya.”

“So,” Sarah spoke as McCoy led her out of the campus. “Where to?”

“There’s an evenin’ cafe not far from here, ‘bout a five minute walk. It’s one of ‘em trendy places that’s only open from seventeen hundred hours until the early hours of the mornin’,” McCoy explained. “It’s a nice place, went there Tuesday night, not too crowded, people are more focused on gettin’ drunk at the bar further down the road.”

“And how did you happen upon it?” Her blue eyes were questioning, and yet, they weren’t accusing or suspicious, just curious, wondering.

“Jim took me to the bar that night, hooked up with some girl, and I got sick of watching them gropin’ each other in the booth so I left, saw this place was open and decided to try their coffee. Non replicated food and drinks, I might add.”

Walking inside Dusk Cafe, Sarah was met with the warm, delicious smell of coffees and chocolates and cakes and pastries, the sight of private booths with limited views for extra privacy, as well as some small circle tables scattered within the centre, and a few square tables alongside the windows. 

There were some older gentlemen situated in one of the centre tables, reading on a display screen, a couple sitting in one of the semi-private booths, and two middle aged women chattering softly between themselves over a cup of steaming coffee. The kitchen buzzed and the two walked up to the counter to order.

“A medium Mars latte please, no marshmallows” Sarah ordered - they were her favourite. One shot of espresso, two shots of caramel, two blocks of chocolate and an extra dusting of cocoa powder. Not many places served them unfortunately.

“Just a large Irish coffee for me, please.” McCoy insistently paid for the both of them, Sarah admitting defeat upon seeing his determined green eyes. Were they not hazel last time?

The two occupied the most private booth they could in the far back corner. Sarah had to admit, the atmosphere was beautiful. There were candles that lined the wall beside them, covered by a thick glass so it was nearly impossible to accidentally burn oneself, and flowers sitting in a vase on the centre of the table, which was promptly moved to the far end so they could lay out their preferred studying utensils whilst sitting beside one another.

McCoy was almost shocked to see Sarah using a pen and notebook, already filled with writings of the content from the past week - he was one of the few people he knew who actually preferred pen and paper instead of some type of advanced, modern technology.

“Why am I not surprised that you ordered an Irish coffee?”

“Why am I not surprised that ya use a pen ‘n’ paper?” She rolled her eyes, her mouth curling upwards slightly, and he reciprocated. 

“Irish coffee is the best kind of coffee.”

“I beg to differ.” Both stared challengingly at the other, before he took out his own notebook, followed by a very expensive looking pen. “Oh, and now I’m not the only one using a notebook, am I?”

He snorted in response, before speaking, “So what does the mighty Miss Foley need assistance with?”

Sarah had moderate understanding, however there were so many gaps in her knowledge, and McCoy realised exactly why she needed help. It was almost as if she couldn’t tie everything in, and they’d only had three classes thus far, the first of which didn’t really count as it was more of an orientation than anything. 

The blue eyed beauty would first look through her notes, before asking various questions, which McCoy would proceed to answer, going in detail and writing and drawing cues to help her understand them better in her notebook. An hour and a half passed before the two decided to get something to eat, hailing a waitress and ordering from the small selection of meals.

“So, is physiotherapy still that bad? I think you’re gettin’ it now.” McCoy spoke, biting off his fork.

“No, it makes perfect sense, it just…” She halted, searching for right way to explain it. “It just doesn’t.”

“Doesn’t make sense?”

“Yes.”

“But it does?”

“Yes.” McCoy rolled his eyes and grumbled something inaudible, then shoved more food in his mouth. “So why did you enlist?”

“My wife kicked me off Earth.” 

“Would you like to explain that further?” McCoy sighed, and Sarah felt saddened for him, his wife must’ve been his only family left, the reason why he never spoke of family when he spoke of his home. “Never mind, it’s not my business.”

“Nah, it’s fine.” He wiped his mouth clean of sauce with a napkin, and proceeded to elaborate, his deep, rough voice sounding more southern than any time it had before. “A couple years ago, ‘bout a year after Pamela ‘n’ I married, she got pregnant. She ended up having a miscarriage though, we found out that the possibility of her carryin’ full term was near zero, ‘n’ even if she did, we might not lose just the baby at the end of it, but her too. I never thought I’d feel so depressed in my life, I’m usually pretty good at not lettin’ things get to me given my line of work but...this got to me… So I buried myself in my work, at least more than I did before, I was still fairly fresh outta medical school, ‘n’ I was an intern at my local clinic. She claimed I wasn’t around enough so I requested a week off, but then I was home too much, there was no winnin’ with her. 

“‘Bout a half year later, I found her screwin’ ‘round with some hick, ‘scuse my language, in our bed, our bed. Wasn’t much later than that I found out the baby wasn’t even mine, it was my best friend’s. Of course, we filed for divorce, but naturally it was my fault ‘cause I just wasn’t around. To sum up my sap story, my wife took my house, my cars, my best friend, my dignity, almost all my money, she even took my damn dog. Felt like I had nothin’, like she took everythin’ I ever had, but the one thing she couldn’t take was the sky. The Earth belonged to her but that just left me the whole damn galaxy, except the flyin’ part was a bit of a problem...but anyhow, that’s how I ended up here.”

“I’m so sorry…” Sarah whispered, placing her hand on McCoy’s in her meek attempt of comfort.

“Ah, it’s not your fault. I shoulda seen the signs a lot earlier than I did.” He looked up at her, brows furrowed as per usual over his dark emerald eyes. “Besides, I’m here now, no goin’ back.”

The young woman couldn’t help but wonder, he seemed so much at ease telling her what he did, something so personal. Why? 

“An eye for an eye,” McCoy started once again, “What brings you here?”

‘That’s why,’ Sarah thought blandly to herself, before opening her mouth, hopelessly trying to find the right words to say to convey her meaning. “There was an accident…”

McCoy didn’t press for answers. He only hoped that by telling her his story, she’d come to trust him eventually. He was a doctor after all, if you couldn’t trust a doctor, who could you trust?

“Say no more, if you don’t wanna tell me just yet. But ya gotta open up to someone at some point, or it’ll just eat ya up inside, ‘n’ you’ll be nothin’ more than an empty shell.”

“And here I thought you were a medical doctor, not a psychologist.”

“I dabbled in psychology in med school.”

They didn’t speak much more about anything other than physiotherapy, the teacher quizzing the student, reestablishing misunderstood concepts, tying up loose ends, then quizzing once more for two more hours, before calling it a night, McCoy walking Sarah to her dorm room like the gentleman he was, before resigning to his own room to a suddenly awakened Jim, who questioned him on his “date” and whether or not they screwed in the toilets.

Naturally, McCoy ignored all allegations, because no matter what he said, Jim was going to believe whatever he wanted to, and even if he believed the truth, he’d still just pick on McCoy for shits and gigs. 

It came as a surprise to the one Leonard McCoy that night, as the land of sleep gently overtook his mind, that he actually enjoyed the young woman’s company, despite knowing she was hiding something. He knew, however, that once she trusted him enough to tell him, or anyone at least, she wouldn’t be the near-emotionless, cold, depressed person anymore. Already, she was starting to slip, and that night, as sleep overtook her, she berated herself for letting him worm his way into her thoughts, bringing down the shields she’d worked so hard to keep maintained over the past few weeks in a matter of hours. Was she just that weak? Or was he just that strong?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I named Bones' ex-wife, 'Pamela' for a few reasons:   
> 1) Most people tend to use 'Jocelyn', and therefore have an association of Bones and Jocelyn, and their daughter, Joanna, and while I contemplated incorporating Joanna into the story, I figured I'd tone it down for myself just a little more to help me keep a firm grasp on whatever it is I'm writing here...  
> 2) Pamela divorces Bones in 2255, which is quite literally perfect for my matching of 'Alternate Reality' Bones (they divorce in 2255 and Bones enlists into Starfleet)  
> 3) Pamela doesn't have as much background on her, and so that gives me some creative freedom with her relationship with Bones.
> 
> I kind of made her a bit of a bitch, didn't I? Yeah...sorry, not sorry...  
> If you'd like to know where I got my information from, I got it from Memory Beta, non-canon so it doesn't follow along the original series such as TOS, TNG or the Alternate Reality movies, etc, but has information from comics and what have you. (See: Jocelyn Treadway and/or Pamela Branch, they're actually a little difficult to find...)


	3. Just a Little

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is a little longer than the others so far. :)

Starfleet was mainly focused on exploring the galaxies, to make peace with different planets, make friendly relations, to boldly go where no one else had been or had dared to. Unfortunately, not every other race was interested in peaceful alliances with Earth, or circumstances required one to know how to protect themselves in hand-to-hand combat. It was for this reason that the Starfleet Academy held basic hand-to-hand combat courses, of which, everyone was required to participate. At the end of these courses, there would be a compulsory “tournament” of sorts, in which one must face various opponents for first place within their respective year levels. All matches were to against two, anyone who did Advanced Combat was required to spar alone against either another person of that class, or two people who were not. 

Sarah did not foresee an issue, neither did Kirk - who was currently taking a combat class - and the few first years in Sarah’s Advanced Combat I class. However, many seemed to think it was a terrible idea.

Bones, in particular, was sure he would get his ass handed to him within seconds. 

“You’ll be fine, you’re panicking too much.” Jim assured his friend, winking at various girls they passed in the courtyard, on their way to the first of three combat classes.

“I’m a doctor, not some karate kid! I don’t fight people, I fix them!” Bones insisted, ignoring Jim’s flirtations with every second girl they walked passed. “I’m gonna need someone to give me a blood transfusion five seconds in!”

“You’re being melodramatic, Bones,” Kirk spoke with a sarcastic roll of his eyes. “Just relax, they’re just basic combat classes, I’ll even be your partner.”

“Oh, great, just great.”

Upon walking into the large hall that neither men had ever seen before, they were greeted with a multitude of faces, some known and others not, filled with varying degrees of anticipation, nervousness, fear of the unknown, and there were fewer that just held a resigned boredom. McCoy and Kirk plainly assumed they were the of the few cadets who did combat classes already, and simply did not smile upon having to return to basics once more.

The hall was nothing more than a large room - there were no chairs, no podiums, no elevation, no stands, just discrete speakers hidden throughout the corners of the ceiling, various encased weapons along the walls, and a matted floor for cushioning. The duo noticed a large metal box tucked into the back corner, probably filled with gloves and guards. Were they to use them today, then? McCoy would’ve appreciated that much from these pointless classes.

At exactly twelve hundred hours, a large, muscled man, with piercing black eyes and a shiny, bald head called the attention of all the cadets with a loud whistle, which echoed from the speakers, piercing the ears of everyone else in the room, including some of the graduated security brought in to help organise the cadets, followed suit and cupped their hands over their ears in pain.

“Now that I have your attention, cadets,” the man began, voice rough and harsh, his hands clasped behind his back intimidatingly, “My name is Commander Rydell, I take all combat and advanced combat classes for Starfleet Academy and I’d like to officially welcome you to your first of three classes in hand-to-hand combat. As you know, these classes are compulsory, and I assure you, all of you have been, and will continue to be, accounted for by the technology of this room. Anyone who is absent without professional and, or, medical verification will receive a deduction of twenty-five percent on their end report at the end of the semester. As I’m sure you’re all well aware, if you fail a semester, you have to repeat the semester; some of you can’t afford to lose such a percentage.

“Some of you may be wondering why you need to partake in this course, the answer is clear. At any given moment, you are at risk of being physically attacked, in space, this likelihood more than doubles - each being you meet is not always quite so friendly, and while many beings may have abilities beyond your imagination, there is always the possibility of a physical attack, or the need of self-defence. You may not always have a security guard trained in martial arts by your side, you may be a doctor beamed onto a planet where it seemed there was no need for security, you may be up against a foe on your starship, the list goes on. However, while I encourage you all to remember these classes, I strongly recommend that you use whatever techniques you’ll be taught only when necessary. Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent.”

With that, Rydell began to instruct his students with basic punches, blocking techniques, throws and how to fall and roll. The advanced combatants were to simply work with cadets who did not take any combat classes, but naturally, there weren’t enough combatants to go around. McCoy and Kirk worked together, Kirk instructing as much as he could, McCoy failing gracelessly.

Sarah had a little more trouble finding a partner to work with, the people she actually maintained conversation with at any given point for various reasons - mostly for quick clarifications in class - were partnered up. She noticed her roommate working with one of her friends, a green female from Orion; there was Hikaru Sulu, a combatant in Sarah’s class, working with a very skinny, pasty white, child. She couldn’t see McCoy but assumed he was working with Kirk. 

But she had no one.

Until there was a light tap on her shoulder. She turned to see a beautiful dark woman, of which she’d barely spoken a word to, Nyota Uhura, who also took Non-Terran Musical Culture. 

“Need a partner?” Uhura smiled warmly. It felt too rude to not respond with at least a upwards curl of the corners of her lips, and with a nod and a small introduction, which was apparently unnecessary on Uhura’s part. 

Uhura was no fighter; a great linguist and musician by all means but fighting was not her forte.

“It’s just so hard, and painful…” Uhura groaned, rubbing her sore arm from where she had blocked a punch Sarah had delivered.

“You never know when you might need to use this, it’s better to have a bruise on your arm than a broken nose and possible severe concussion.” The blue eyed girl spoke mechanically. It was, after all, one of the most standard lessons in self defence. 

“Has that happened to you before?” 

“No, I blocked it.”

“Oh.” Sarah sighed, she could see she was making Uhura slightly uncomfortable, and while she had no ill intentions towards the linguist, the linguist was merely trying to engage in conversation, despite Sarah’s best efforts to avoid them. Would there really be any harm in a little conversation…?

“Here,” She began, placing her hands on the dark girl’s hips and moving them slightly, evening them out. “Your speed and power comes from your core and your hips, you need to move them if you expect to be able to get out of any situation that’ll compromise your physical well-being. You’re slim, and small, so use that to your advantage, make yourself harder to hit, more lithe and agile, and that’ll more than likely throw your attacker off balance. I’m controlled but your attacker probably won’t be unless they’re well trained.”

“So, use their strength against them?”

“Old fashioned and cliched, but yeah, pretty much.” Uhura smiled her thanks, and Sarah nodded back. “Let’s try working on your landing then. I probably shouldn’t be teaching you more appropriate techniques from various throws and falls, at least, not just yet, but I think it could really help you understand the idea physically instead of just mentally.”

The two continued, mainly focusing on the tasks at hand. Rydell passed them at some point, seeing Sarah instruct Uhura on how to flip someone over properly, and credited her for moving forward with a sensible throwing technique.

An hour and a half later, they were dismissed, and Sarah was ready to leave and begin studying for her upcoming Weapon Engineering test, but Uhura wouldn’t allow it, she insisted upon treating her to a coffee as a thanks for all her help, leading her to one of the cafes on the campus. Charla and her friend - Sarah found out her name was Gaila, Uhura’s roommate - accompanied them.

Upon their orders, Sarah insisted on paying for her own Mars latte, and assured Uhura that she could help her with her musical culture homework, of which she seemed more than happy to oblige.

Uhura, Charla and Gaila chattered animatedly about various things, from homework, to commanders, to cute boys in classes, including the dorky Russian kid that they all wanted to smush because he is so precious! 

The topic even sauntered over to Sarah’s own love life, to her absolute (discrete) terror.

“He was pretty hot, y’know? What did you call him? Bones...?” Charla thought that discussing the good doctor was a fantastic idea. Sarah wanted to go back to their room and hide all her make up… 

“His name is McCoy.”

“You’re totally fucking him,” She insisted, drinking her chai tea with a wicked grin. “Is he any good?”

“Oh, my goodness, I know who you’re talking about now!” Uhura gasped, eyes mischievously smirking at Sarah as well. “The cute guy that hangs out with that smart ass, Kirk, nice choice.”

“We’re not involved, like, at all.” The blue eyed girl was fearful at this point. She didn’t need any rumours about her sleeping with McCoy going around and reaching his ears, she still needed his tutelage. “He’s a doctor, so he’s helping me with Spatial Physiotherapy is all. It’s not my best class.”

“You prefer the physical side of things, right?” Whatever it was that Cadet Uhura implying, Sarah didn’t dignify with a response. All three girls decided they’d leave her alone for the time being and continued to chatter about meaningless topics that held no interest in the young woman’s mind, and so she excused herself, with the excuse that needed to study for a test. 

It was true, she did have her test coming up, but she was still going to pass with flying colours, and studying wasn’t necessarily needed given her level of understanding on the matter. Over ninety-five percent, however, is still better than below it, so why not aim for that?

***  
Another month passed, and all combat classes had finished, to the relief of many. It was challenging and rewarding, but certainly painful if you didn’t quite grasp the concepts and fell on your backside most ungraciously. McCoy was fairly certain he was about to throw out his back if he didn’t get it looked over soon but he’s a doctor, dammit! He did not need anyone else’s help if he just took it easy, and massaged the parts where it twinged and thankfully, he could reach. 

However, the tournament was to be held on the upcoming Saturday, ten hundred hours exactly, so as to not disrupt any classes, and Saturday came too soon.

“Hey, it’s cool, I pulled some strings to make sure you and I would be partners in the tournament.” Kirk grinned proudly at McCoy on the day of said tournament. “I got your back, bro.”

“Oh, that’s just great! You’ve got so many assholes angry with ya that we’re both gonna get our asses kicked by some jackass in the Advanced Combat class! What were ya thinkin’?” Kirk scratched the back of his guiltlessly; he wanted to feel bad for the doctor but McCoy’s accent got thicker in his violent desperation, and honestly, it was kind of funny. “Stop laughin’, you moron!”

They walked up to see their names on one of the large screens in the hall foyer, summoning them to Area Four for their first match against a name they were familiar with, Hikaru Sulu. There were ten areas, and therefore, ten matches executed at the same time. 

Sarah was called to Area Seven, against two people she’d really rather not hit, Uhura and Gaila. 

McCoy and Kirk circled Sulu, who seemed intensely freaked out to their confusion. Was he not in an advanced class? Unbeknownst to them, Sulu was more concerned about having to spar without his sword, it had been a long time since he had been forced to spar two opponents empty handed, and his combat classes mainly had him focusing on one opponent, up close and personal. Up close and personal wasn’t going to cut it just yet…

A mere ten minutes later - mostly due to to Kirk’s intuition, they had Sulu pinned beneath their weight. Sulu was very light and agile but once Kirk had managed to catch him, McCoy wasn’t far behind. Sitting on him with their combined weights left him without any option but to concede defeat.

Uhura and Gaila, on the other hand, were not so lucky. Sarah was a martial artist who relied on her own limbs than other weapons, and was very sure of herself, very fast and very controlled. She had managed to take down Gaila within the first minute, pinning her at her upper back with her foot, and delivered a strong kick to Uhura’s stomach, knocking the wind out of her. Uhura was still determined not to relent to Sarah’s prowess.

One firm strike to the back of Gaila’s neck knocked her unconscious, though it wouldn’t last long; Sarah needed to act fast or she would wake up. 

Uhura began circling, looking for any weaknesses in Sarah’s guard, just like she had taught her to do. She learnt well, but six hours worth of self defence meant nothing in the face of ten years of intense training.

Seconds passed, and Sarah struck, fast but not strong, allowing Uhura to use her knowledge to block it. The dark woman reacted quickly, grabbing her arm and tossing the blue eyed beauty over in a take down, but that was just what Sarah wanted. One mere moment later and Uhura was pinned at the shoulders and waist by Sarah, her knees digging painfully into her sides.

“Do you forfeit?”

“Yeah, I forfeit…” Of course, Sarah was kindly enough to help the poor woman back up, asking if she needed any first aid, and she was greeted by words of optimism, that she wouldn’t even need a dermal regenerator for a bruise on her stomach. Gaila woke a minute later saying that she needed a hypo for the ‘killer headache’ she had.

The semi finals approached sooner than expected. Sarah had made it through, naturally, as had McCoy and Kirk. McCoy would shamelessly admit that he only got that far because of Kirk’s insane ability to not get pushed around too much. There was even a round where he nearly did get knocked out by some big guy named ‘Cupcake’ and his not so beefy friend...Kirk and the Cupcake punched each other around fiercely, using whatever throws and falls and defensive techniques they had been taught, but McCoy and the little guy didn’t do much…well, it wasn’t his fault, McCoy didn’t mean to knock him out, his face just got considerably close to his elbow!

There were two others in the semi-finals, both men from the Advanced Combat class, unsurprisingly, up against one another, and to McCoy’s horror, he and Kirk were up against Sarah.

The most terrifying aspects of this was that, one, how in the world could he hit a lady? Two, she was going to destroy them, he could just tell…

The other two men sparred and parried threateningly, as everyone watched. The semi-final rounds were one after the other so the finalists could scope out their competition. Sarah noticed some cadets making bets in the corner as to who would win, though she tried very hard to ignore it. She didn’t like fighting for the sake of fighting, friendly competition was one thing, but some of the combatants were anything but friendly, particularly William Abrams, and Orshaq, a banished male from Varro. The rumour was he was conspiring against his home planet in order to destroy them, and when they found out, they cast him out. Sarah didn’t put much stock in rumours, but what she was sure of was he was the best in their class, the strongest and most agile, and Abrams had no hope.

Her thoughts were correct when Abrams limped out to get first aid for a possible broken rib and sprained ankle - the blue eyed girl thought he was lucky he escaped with that much.

When it was her turn to spar McCoy and Kirk, she could feel her hesitancy rise once more, she really didn’t want to fight the one person who had been helping her with her worst subject, or his perverted friend, although his stupid smirk wasn’t helping that particular cause.

Commander Rydell shouted for them to begin, and in a flash, Kirk launched at her - he was no idiot, he’d seen bits and pieces of her matches, and she all but wiped the floor with her opponents, barely breaking a sweat. 

He tackled her, trying to keep her pinned, while McCoy stood in the background, the southern gentleman in him screaming at him to kick Kirk away, that he was hurting her, but there was no need for that, Sarah speedily thrust her palm into Kirk’s face and punched the conjuncture of where his knee and thigh met, in order to provide enough pain to keep him down for a bit, then she looked at the doctor across from her, hearing cheers from different people, some yelling at her to get on with it, some yelling at him to do something, and Kirk was one of them. McCoy didn’t listen though, he just stood, fighting with himself instead.

“I’m sorry, Bones.” She noticeable frowned, one of the largest facial expressions he’d seen her wearing since they’d met.

“For what?” She struck out her arm, intending to jar the bottom of her palm along the side of his head, hopefully just enough to knock him out without doing any real damage, but he ducked as fast as he could, grabbing her arm and twisting it behind her in a lock, his other arm wrapping around her neck in a choke hold. “I should be sayin’ sorry.”

“Are you sure?” She began to struggle to give him the benefit of the doubt, and McCoy held on tighter but to her horror, Kirk had started to get up, walking over to them with a heavy limp. He brought his arm back to punch her in the stomach, an effective method of winding without necessarily long lasting damage. She struggled, hearing whispers of ‘I’m sorry’ in her ear as the man holding her tightened his grip. “Don’t be.”

In one swift movement, she lifted herself off the ground, knowing McCoy would still be holding her, and double kicked Kirk in the chest, knocking him back on his ass with a loud groan, using the force of the kick to push her up and nearly flip over, if it weren’t for McCoy’s insistent hold on her, insuring that he fell first, softening the blow. He hadn’t necessarily meant to, his body just reacted, although he was sure he would do it time and time again. He was grumpy, but he wasn’t a complete asshole. 

The fall had him gasping for air, and an incomprehensible pain shot through his back, he almost didn’t register the booming voice of Rydell announcing Sarah as the winner.

Sarah rubbed her right arm a little. It had pulled a little uncomfortably during the fall, but she disregarded it once she was able to help McCoy up, his now very dark eyes looking at her accusingly.

“You knew I was going to hold onto ya tighter if you struggled, didn’t ya? Ya planned that the entire time.” His brows furrowed and he grumbled his congratulations. “I probably woulda just forfeited if ya asked.”

“I’ll keep that in mind next time.”

“Gee, thanks.”

“Ugh, remind me to never piss you off, Foley.” Kirk grumbled as he approached them, rubbing his chest sorely. “We should totally get together some time and work out, you and me, all hot and sweaty.”

“You should really get your back seen to, Bones.” Sarah addressed, not bothering to respond to the blond. “You won’t be much of a doctor if you can’t get out of bed.”

She walked off to grab some water, taking advantage of the few precious minutes she had to prepare for her spar, no, her battle with Orshaq. She had worked with him once or twice in class, and he was not kind. He fought to win, nothing else.

A few people bid their best wishes as she passed, Uhura and Gaila, Sulu and his tiny Russian friend she now knew as Pavel Chekov, with deepest sympathies patted her back. Even Charla gave her a sympathetic smile, she may not have been bright but even she knew when someone was going to come back out of a fight with a bloodied up face in such circumstances…

The time had come. 

Standing across from Orshaq made her feel like a ten year old again, just like the time when she had decided to learn self defence in varying forms.

Back then, the boy bullying her had her trapped in a corner, and he was not only bigger than her, but taller, stronger and older. 

“Begin!” Rydell shouted, and a mere second later, she felt a roundhouse kick slam into her stomach, throwing her back several feet. She coughed and groaned, rolling over to try and pick herself back up but before she could even get her hands off the ground, she felt Orshaq’s foot on her middle back, stomping her back down. She wasn’t even the slightest bit sure she could get out of this mess.

All she could do was provoke him into letting her up…

She started tugging at his shoe on his other foot, causing him to snarl, release her from the back hold and instead, stomped his foot on her arm. The searing pain brought tears into her eyes, but she would not allow them to fall. With quick, deft movements, she swung her legs up in a dangerously uncomfortable position to kick him in the groin, (she felt a pull at her hips that felt a little permanent but she needed to get out from under his shoe, and not just literally).

He stumbled back, cupping himself for a few moments - the Varro species has a very high pain tolerance, unfortunately - before launching at her once more. This time, Sarah was quick enough to dodge under him, a benefit of being the smaller one in a fight, and lifted her knee into his stomach.

He grabbed his stomach with a growl, and with heavy breaths, Sarah rushed at him, punching him in the face over and over, knuckles beginning to deepen with blue, tar-like blood, but he stood his ground. Faster than lightning, his hand whipped out and caught her fist, her fear escalating dramatically. His other arm swung back, and then slammed forward into her face, just as fast, if not faster than any other attack he’d thrown. 

Her body hit the ground painfully, and not another sound could be heard with the exception of Sarah’s groans and Orshaq’s heavy breathing. Everyone else in the room was watching in horror, even Rydell was stunned at the amount of force used in this simple tournament. 

“And that’s the match!” The commander shouted, but he was not heard. The blue-blooded Varro knelt beside the human girl, who stared at him in the eyes, daring him, challenging him. He grabbed the front of her clothes, preparing to unleash one last devastating blow, Sarah’s blue orbs slipping behind her eyelids as she prepared for unconsciousness. 

“Enough!” Rydell boomed. “Orshaq, you will face severe punishment if you continue!”

The girl felt her body reconnect fully with the floor and heard Orshaq’s stomping feet. The medical staff rushed over to Sarah at once, taking her away to the nearby med bay, and bandaging her stomach which thankfully, didn’t pertain any broken ribs, and her arm, which ripped open from the force of Orshaq’s boot. There was a small cut on her cheekbone, and a black eye was beginning to form, but she was otherwise, pretty well off. Nothing had broken, she pulled her thigh muscle, and she was bleeding, but nothing was broken.

She felt warm hands inspecting her back, awaiting reactions but receiving none. She would not allow the faint bruising on her back to bring her down, she would not bow to anyone, or to any pain. That was why she took up self defence in the first place, so she could get stronger, to stand on her own two feet with her own inner strength. She would not let this defeat get the better of her, she would work harder, longer, and she would succeed. 

“Did ya wanna use the dermal regenerator to help fasten the healin’ process?” A familiar voice rang out in a deep whisper, dangerously close, deft fingers still pressing points along her spine, like a massage more than anything.

“Bones,” She said softly. “When did you get here?” Did she hit her head? She didn’t remember him in the small medical bay, behind her curtain. 

“‘Bout three minutes ago. The nurse started workin’ on your back, said ya seemed fine all ‘round but I wanted to make sure myself.”

“Oh.”

“So?”

“‘So’, what?”

“Are ya?”

“Fine? Yes, I am.”

“I guess there’s not much more I can hope for.” The pressure of his fingers intensified, pressing at the pain, pushing it away.

“Are you?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?”

“You went down pretty hard.”

“Nah, I was a bit surprised is all. I’m a Southerner, darlin’, takes a lot more than that to hurt me.” The brunette decided she wouldn’t get much more out of him, he was as stubborn as a mule, maybe it had something to do with being a doctor. One can hardly treat a patient when they have yet to be treated.

“How’s Kirk?”

“His pride is wounded but I think he’s more concerned ‘bout you. Same with Uhura.” Funny, how people that barely knew her, overlooked her rudeness and easy dismissal of them and held concern for her. People were very strange. “You took quite a beatin’, why didn’t you forfeit?”

“If you let people walk all over you, all you’re going to be is a stepping stone to their success, and you’ll never get there yourself.”

“So, if you wanna get somewhere, you gotta walk all over people?”

“I didn’t say that, smart ass.” 

“I’m gonna administer some painkillers now,” Before she had any time to react, she felt the sharp stab in her neck, responding with a high pitched, ‘Shit!’ The two stiffened...did she really just squeal? In front of someone else? In front of Bones?!

“I’d appreciate it if you removed that from your memory.”

“Are you kiddin’ me?” He laughed, actually laughed, and Sarah turned to see him pinching the bridge of his nose as his shoulders bounced, before he looked at Sarah’s face, trying desperately to return to homeostasis. “That was kinda adorable, just so ya know.”

“Shut up.” The green eyed man simply grinned. “Does it hurt?”

“Does what hurt?”

“This.” She slapped his forearm as she glared at him, to which he retracted his arm, and looked at her, cradling it in jest, still grinning.

“Just a little.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Dammit, I'm a Language Student, not a Doctor!   
> Okay, seriously, I tried to avoid saying anything medical-related, so if you happen to take medical advice from anything in here, I'm not responsible for what happens...  
> However, I am familiar with martial arts and I do know what I'm talking about, but unfortunately, martial arts is a physical art, not a verbal one, and is therefore, difficult to convey in literature. I hope you could understand enough to take what you could here and visualise as much as possible. That being said, it's not completely important for the story that you understand the way fight/spar/battle scenes are unfolding in the foreseeable 'Look at the Stars' future. :)


End file.
